Why I Hate Women....

I've always been one to shy away from having women as friends.
It was in high school that I noticed that always ended up with a numerous amount of boysas friends. At the time I really didn't think about it too much. I mean, I enjoyed all the things that most girls enjoy, such as makeup, fashion, talking about boys, etc. But for some reason, I just seemed to be more at ease and comfortable with the boys. They weren't shy to talk honestly around me. It was this honesty that gave me trust in them. It was neither uncommon for a large amount of vulgar words to be used. (Perhaps this is the cause of my sailor mouth today.) The guys never turned their back on me either. They were always there talk to, hang out with, give advice to, or shoot pool and vodka. It always seemed to be the girls that you had to watch out for. It was a job trying to keep in line "who was mad at who", "who was dating who's ex-boyfriend", and "this is why you can't talk to her anymore'.

It wasn't until college, after having several female roommates that I realized one of the problems that I had with women. We hold everything in until the most inoportune moment to release it all on a hell bent tyrade of bitch. I would watch as my roommate would allow her boyfriend to consume my food without asking, as she filled five trash bags in a weekend and then let them sit in the kitchen rotting, or borrowed my clothes without asking, only to wear them in front of me. Then I would unleash one of these tyrades myself. It was then that I figured it out. The reason I was more comfortable with the guys, was because they actually told you what was on their mind. If something bothered them, they let you know. It wasn't awkward, but rather honest. And then it was over, resolved. There were no late night phone calls bitching about things to be pissed about and how SOMEDAY we would let them know what we really thought. There were also all the perks of having a guys as friends. There was always someone around the help you fix something, finish off the leftovers, tell you the truth about how fat your ass looked in a pair of jeans, or how beautiful you looked when you were still wearing pajamas from yesterday.

But now there has come a time in my life where I have reached an all new level of hatred. Up until this point I have simply avoided befriending women before I could determine their level of bitch. Don't get me wrong, I have a lot of good friends who are girls that I would trust with my life. But I was cautious in befriending them. Recently though I have come across the new category of woman. Those who are threatened.

I am typically one of those people who is anything but impolite until you give me reason to be. This is completely unlike the women who I have been unlucky enough to meet in the past few weeks. I recently started working at my good friend's wine shop. During wine tastings I help with sales and basic customer service. At the past few wine tastings, I have been privledged enough to be engaged with this new type of rude woman. I have been given nasty stares, had my job degraded, doors slammed in my face, and watched as they prance by in heels without simple hello, or how are you doing. What causes this? At the age of twenty-nine are we really in competition? And if we are competing, what exactly are we competing for? Please let me know so I can prepare and strategize. And until I am told of what the competition is about, please don't look at my comfortable flip flops and think that you have "beat me" in your black leather stilettos. I'll still be able to walk tomorrow. And if my shirt has become dusty from physical work that I have engaged in, please don't point it out to me, I promise I'm aware of this and really could not give a damn. I do not point out the obvious flaws that I see in you.

I feel as though these women are trying to take me over to the dark side. They are trying to get me to enter in on the competition with them. Join in on their race to this unknown happiness. Now I'm forced to reason over whether I should keep my mouth shut and let them be who they are, or perhaps finally gain enough courage to speak up and teach her a lesson on being human.